Day 15 — The people you miss the most

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart. ~ Elisabeth Foley


To my crazy, wonderful friends known as the Psychz,

There’s something about old friends that sets them apart, something that makes that bond so strong that it eventually  becomes an irrevocable part of a person’s identity. It’s more than just nostalgia for the good old days. Rather, it’s the truth that caring unreservedly about someone, without the precautions that growing up will eventually teach, makes an indelible mark on the soul. Time, and the marks that other people will inevitably make, cannot erase it or cover it up. That’s how I’ve always felt about you guys. There’s a part of me, one of the best parts, that’s defined by what we shared all those years ago.

With the uncertainty surrounding me now, I find myself wishing I could revisit those simpler, more carefree years with you. I want to see Jireh rocking with his earphones again, and Gino working on another incredible drawing, and Irish Jay finishing the physics exam in half the time. I want to watch Seneca tie her hair in a ponytail, the simple act becoming an exhibition of feminine grace. I even miss the sight of Jemar practicing his martial arts moves, and Ate Jhay scolding us for being too loud, and Johnard teasing Marivic endlessly. There are more memories in my heart than I can recount, each one of them precious. No matter where I go, you have always been the most colorful, fascinating people I have ever known.

Yet as clearly as I can see those images in my mind, I also know that they are no longer a perfect reflection of reality. All of us — whether in big or small ways — have changed, and some of the most significant transformations are also the most subtle. So I miss you all the more, because I want to see how you’ve grown. I want to get to know the people you’ve become, and love the new version of you. And in a way, perhaps I am also seeking a better idea of who I am now through your eyes.  Perhaps I also need to discover if you can love the person I turned out to be.

I miss you. I miss us. And no matter how much time has gone by, there will always be a part of me that’s counting the days until I can see you again.

Love, always,

Abegz

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